So so sick of poly life..

This date 4 years ago,

I lost someone very dear to me.

9th January 2012.

3 years have gone by like that.

Popo, I want you to know that I miss you alot.

Sorry, I just really am too lazy to blog. If anyone’s reading anyway, that is(:

Anyway, I suppose this should be my last post till maybe feb? Or my next holiday.

I have 3 major assignments due end jan-early feb. Thats about 5-6 weeks away.

Hardcore filming and aftereffects.

And really, arghhh I’ve never done this..in terms of blogging out negative emotions towards a certain person. But really, please please do your part in the assignments. You are in poly already dear, please please step up and take responsibility for your work. Please please. I don’t understand how you want to cut yourself some slack and still get the same grades as the rest who put in so much hardwork, in covering all the work that you are suppose to share with us. Please, please.

Argh..this whole month, two months, will be so so challenging. God, let me stay close to you.

And I will still make effort to read despite all the deadlines for all my assignments! Okay, goodbye!

2012 is going to be great!

 

Persistent

I will learn to be persistent in my requests to God.

I believe my mum will come to know of Your love.

A few months, a few years. A decade(I hope not), I must learn to be persistent in prayer.

Because only when I pray, I am that much closer to You.

 

 

 

Drawing.

Okay, its the same time of the night and I’m able to blog now.

Wanted to get this post up a few weeks back, but nah..not disciplined enough to.

Okay, anyway I really wanna share about this recent thought.

Its with regards to my drawing module that I’m taking now.

You know, God has never given me the talent of drawing. I honestly can’t draw for nuts. Yes, you might had seen more “presentable” artworks from me, but those took like many hours and hardwork to achieve. I don’t understand shading, can’t get my proportion, perspective right at times, bad at using colour mediums, have to stare at a display for sooo long in order to get my first stroke out.

I’m not kidding, I really suck at drawing. I got no artistic talents at all.

But you know what? I really think its okay man.

The previous sem I’ve always been so concerned over my friends’ drawings, those sitting beside me during drawing lessons, every now and then I would glance over at their artwork, look at mine and feel so disappointed and inferior.

My classmates really can draw, serious.

But when this sem started, I realise one thing.

So what if I don’t draw well? So what if my classmates draw so much better than me?

Its never about comparing.

God did not give me the talent of drawing, but He has given me a few other talents.

Though I don’t have the talent, as long as I give my best, put in those hours of effort, that is all thats required of me, isn’t it?

I might not get the same grade as my friends, but it doesn’t matter. Really.

In whatever ways I can, I work hard to improve my drawing. But in other things that I can’t control, that is up to God already.

Anyways, I’m ending my drawing module soon!! Another 10 weeks or so?? Haha, shall continue to draw with peace, assurance and joy in my heart every drawing lesson now.(:

Have a blessed week!

 

Its gotta be one of the most tiring weeks ever since I started poly.

Filming 4/7 days this week. Major module assignments to be handed up these two weeks/

Shall work hard and enjoy my well deserved break when it comes.

When I’m distressed, I pray.

When I’m tired, I pray.

When I’m clueless,  I pray.

When I’m thankful, I pray.

No matter what I’m feeling, I shall pray..

God please look after me these 2 weeks. (:

Beauty

An excerpt from a new book I’m on.

“Only 2 percent of woman think they are beautiful according to a recent survey. That reality is a little strange because beauty has never been easier to come by than it is today. The plastic surgey business is booming. Beauty products are boundless. We are surrounded by a plethora of books, magazines, and TV shows that provide us with all the secrets and techniques we need to look, act and feel like a confident, beautiful young woman. We have all the tools we need. And most of us spend a huge portion of our time trying to make ourselves alluring.

Yet in an ironic twist , we still feel ugly. We still feel worthless. We still feel like we aren’t “there” yet.”

I don’t care if I’m sounding like some holy person to you, but I know and believe that you, you, you and you is and will always be beautiful in God’s eyes.
Stop trying to become who you are not, yes, that girl has silmmer legs, waist, beautiful features..etc..but you know what. That girl is NOT you.
You are all that God has created you to be already. Be assured of that.

I now have a tumblr. And when I’m ready, I’ll share the link.(:

Okay, I suddenly have this urge to blog about something.
I was researching and thinking about food that I should eat to stay healthy.
I have a plan to bring home cooked meals to school to reduce my expenditure on food and to stay healthy.
I really feel that I’m quite unhealthy. Don’t ask me how I know, but you just feel and know it. Haha.
I’m not overweight or whatever, but I know I’m unhealthy.
I’ve been consuming food like nobody’s business this holidays, and though I did exercise about once in 2 weeks(?!!!), haha its not enough man.
Since stopping sports, I’ve not been disciplined enough to go exercise on my own.
Okay, but yes that is just a plan. Unless I’m really disciplined to go grocery shopping reguarly, and waking up early to cook, my home cooked meals to school probably won’t happen. Haha
Thinking about my food etc, led me to this thought during my bath.

“I don’t want to be skinny, I just want to be healthy.”

As long as I can remember, I always hear girls, (myself included) saying “I’m very fat leh.”
I don’t know whether its an attention seeking method, but I genuinely know that all girls suffer from self esteem, insecurities issues.
All of us want to come across as pretty, slim, beautiful..basically we want our outer appearance to look good. Haha.
And in this age that we’re living in, the mainstream media has so much influences on our young minds.
Our kpop idols are slim and beautiful(probably plastic).
But really, after coming to know God, I learn to start placing and surrendering my insecurities into God’s hands.
I’m not pretty, I’m not slim, I’m not super talented..
But but..I know my Mr Right will come in God’s timing and he will love and accept me exactly the way I am.
Not solely because of my outer appearance or talents. But first and foremost because of who I am on the inside.
That I trust in God’s timing and plan.
Yes, I’m just like any other 17 year old..who goes arghh..”that guy very shuai leh..” if i catch some handsome guy in the canteen or what..but haha dont take it too seriously okay.
I’m just a normal typical 17 year old.

I will choose to place my insecurities into God’s hand and trust that God has the best plan for me irregardless of whatever that happens.(:
If you want a prince, you better be a princess. Haha.